Innocence Lost

Pure white, pale white
By three drops of blood
Pricked from a finger
And falling into a deep slumber of numbness

The words are slow to come
In a sunny room on a sunny day
Her heart stops beating

The transition from pink to red is made in a breath
As the words are spoken casually, but
The world still erupts into fire, and not ice
And she is burned alive

Those dreams
Those hopes
Those fantasies
As she throws the fairytales and storybooks into the flames
Because magic never existed
And lies are the only truth of the world

Where is that girl?
She is dead and buried
And a new one has emerged in her place
Numb to the images, numb to the screams, numb to the words
Of evil

She opens her eyes
And sees:
The world is not black and white nor is it grey
White has been suffocated by black
And the good ones have died

She struggles to realise that
She must now
Comfort those who have comforted her
Nurture those who have nurtured her
Love those who loved her
Because the heroes are now villains

She mutters
She cries
She screams
In the middle of the night
And turns up the music
And pretends it was a dream

To forget
To forget
To forget
Those hateful words
Which are a boomerang and
Break her heart
A thousand times over

Salt water and fresh water are one
As she realises that the woman
She wanted to become
Is the girl she is

No man is an island
But girls are continents unto themselves
Drifting out to sea
With nothing to anchor her

The cracking of a heart
The splitting of a soul
Happen for the first time
And then again
And again
And again and againagainagainagain

Colour is devoid of light
Sound is devoid of meaning
And never will it change now

And she is alone
So that with hands clasped
Bruises dripping with blood
Knees bent
And tears mingling with dust
Does she cry to the only one who might hear
In hopes it may be regained

Screams which are unheard
Scars which are unseen
And tears which are barely visible under an ocean of sorrow

And there she stands before her
With her false words
No matter the intense feeling of regret
That bird has flown
And never will it return

As she dies by fire and is reborn through ice

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